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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Worship Leaders, Pastors, and Worship in General

So after another class today I have some serious thoughts and scenarios running through my head. My professor advocated against worship being so influenced by music. He stated that the early Baptists were correct in the limiting of service to no singing, and even no music was not necessarily a bad judgment. Better yet he labeled christian contemporary worship music as repetitive trash, and the idea of worship leader a joke.

The point of class seemed to be that the early Baptists were not then and now should not be a group that gathers to worship with "soul patches and arms spread wide singing trash" on the guitar to worship God, they need to be grounded in historical Calvinistic ideology. Hence, the early Baptist service that played and sang Psalms, if any music and entirely being what came from the sermon should be normative, because it should be like a service we find only in scripture.

My problems are these:

1) If we should return to a Calvinistic understanding of our faith why then should we bother how we worship?
2) In addition why do we bother to have outreach?

My what if(s):

1) What if we return to a Calvinistic understand of our faith? If we become strict adherents of Calvin we must remember that there is no such thing as being able to worship unless God divinely directs one to worship. Therefore any way is worship if done in the church or by Christians because a "true church" according to Calvinistic doctrine is any church made up of the elect, because no true church is made up of anything else. There all worshiping is done in a manner in which God has ordained in a Calvinistic church and this argument is mute.

Secondly, if churches that are meeting and worship with a leader and full out rock band are not "true churches" then that would greatly decrease the number of Southern Baptists; in addition if they are not real churches that means their history would be one in which they sent many members to hell, and God divinely directed that as well.

2) Why bother with outreach and missions if we return to Calvin? We have the elect and the doomed. Nothing can change that status, and we should simply focus on our own problems and concerns because God has already saved those he will save, no amount of mission work will be needed because whether or not they hear the Gospel they are saved.

My thoughts stand as this:

I would venture to say that in large part the current SBC does not adhere to mostly Calvinistic thought, though they would argue they do. In addition, Southeastern itself should stand as a walking contradiction. Southeastern has the largest mission program in the SBC, with an entire school and degree programs in missions. If this is the case, why would we waste money sending people to spread the Gospel, or have statistics on those accepting and rejecting the Gospel, God already picked them, we are having no real affect.

Secondly, if worship leaders are not what is needed, and the focus on the service and worship is solely what is coming from the pulpit why do pastors have so little to say? If what is the norm now is that people don't feel like they worshiped because they didn't sing what does that say came from the pulpit, little. It seems than that the problem is not based on singing in worship but that many pastors don't say anything that has a lasting impact on the congregation like a song that can tell a life story, or speak of God has the ability to do.

Further, if the only understanding for what our churches should look like comes only from scripture, why then do we have to have leaders with doctorates, schools, seminaries and everything else to minister. The early church was led by fishermen! They had no doctorate, no book deals, they taught what was their life, what God had intimately done for them. Apparently, our churches today do nothing but have to train people what to say because they have no experience of their own.

Further I would argue that we need to mostly reject Calvin, and Luther and whoever else because our theology should come from God. Calvin said that we can do nothing on our own accord, whether we worship or curse God comes from God, therefore we would have no outreach, no anything. Further, Calvin as leader in Geneva murdered, as leader he burned at the stake those who disagreed or were counted as heretics. His understudy Zwingli did the same. So how can we return to that theology? It is like taking everything that Luther said, he also argued on Good Fridays for the beating and attack of the Jews? That doesn't sound to scriptural to me either.

If we are to be a Church, not an SBC, a Methodist, a Catholic one we need to check ourselves at the door. Remember it should be Christ who lives in us, no Calvin. We read the Gospels and forget that Jesus was homeless, poor, and counter-culture, read the sermon on the mount. How can we then disrespect his blood, on his cross by saying that he only died for a select few. Think now of the 6 billion people plus that live on this earth, how can we say he only died for a few of them in totality when we think of how many have lived on earth. That is a trivialization of the passion that I want to have no part of and Mr. Calvin can answer to God for that on his own.

Further, I am fine with a worship service based on the sermon that is how it should be it should be God's word for his people at that time. So Pastors, do your job, stop googling sermons and getting them off a website, stop using book print outs for a sermon. Search for God, and search him for hours, beg him to give you what needs to be said, say something other than we need a bigger sanctuary, stained glass, more pews, more seats, more involvement. Your passion should make people run to the altar in tears, or run out of service to get a friend to bring them to hear what you are saying.

If worship leaders, and Chris Tomlin's songs are the biggest problem with the Southern Baptist Convention and with churches in general, that is a road that I do not want to be on. Let me not even take time to mention if we return to Calvin and the NT that the women are told they can not speak, or teach in church anymore. And church pageants, man, there goes another one out the window, I don't think Peter and Paul were trying to audition for one when they were serving, at least we don't have it in scripture, there goes another ministry.


Oh, America, how we have become so comfortable that our arguments come over singing in church, and christian rock. Meanwhile millions go poor, millions are murdered, and millions walk out of a church where nothing is said every Sunday for a lifetime and its Chris Tomlin, Jeremy Camp and Hillsong's fault for singing of the Glory of God. But not the Pastor who has neglected his flock because he doesn't have the time to search God's word for his church but can use an outline from Rick Warren for 40 days! Its not the national leaders that spend time in hotels, and argue over the communion bread, or the wording of a sentence when they should be out preaching to the lost. It is the words, it is the chords, and its the music that are hurting the people of the church. Somehow, it seems there is more to it.

In closing it is said that David became undignified before his wife for singing and dancing before God, his wife was punished while David was given a covenant with God that through his family the Messiah would come. For David his actions and words inspired all those around him, while Michal looked only at the words of the Law. For David the Law was on his heart, it was God that so inspired him, for Michal she had the commentary of men on how one is follow the code, but not the relationship with God.

If we continue down the rode of how we should preach, how we should worship, and how we should vote instead of where we should go, where we should preach, and where we should praise this will be our tombstone and it will read:

We became like Michal. Our legacy was like hers, the American church from then was barren until death.

Saturday, January 2, 2010


It's 5 am and I can't sleep.

God does that sometimes when he wants to talk, right?

I am so confused.
I am so hurt.
I am so full of sin.

Oh, but there is forgiveness.
Oh, but there is redemption.
Oh, but there is an eternity to get this right, to love you God.

My heart is broken, for the world. Why are they so lost, why are we so lost?

God come now, and heal your people.
God come now and use me.

My heart, my heart, my heart is yours.

He is coming, on the white horse. He is coming.
Prepare the way for the Lord.

The King he is coming. Oh come King, return to your barren land.

I am comatose without you.
Bring me to life.
I am fully alive.
You said you would never leave.
Let's comb the room, stay all night.

My mind is a mess of redemption, of forgiveness, I am flooded by the weight of it all, but the yoke of my Jesus is beautiful. I will carry His cross today. Bring the pain, the blood the hate. I want the world to despise me, because Satan is king of this present darkness. I will scream at the top of my lungs that Jesus is Lord, and every knee shall bow before him, and everything confess that Jesus is Lord. If we fail the rocks will scream, the rocks will cry. The mountains crumble and the waves crash to make known the power and glory of the Lord Almighty.

I am nothing but a wretched sinner, a child before my Lord. Yet his coal has come now and touched my tongue, and my spirit is cleansed. Demons will have no power, only the words of my God shall forever spring from my mouth.

The tide has turned in me, I am no longer going to be a complacent observer of the failures of this world, to sin run rampant. The Lord God proclaims that He shall be a streetlight to those wandering lost in the darkness, he proclaims that this decade is His, and a harvest shall be reaped. Prepare, gird yourselves as His servant Job and question and He shall answer. He calls to his people now, come and I will cure your backsliding. Only in YHWH, the great I AM, is there forgiveness of your depravity.

God is majesty, and ascribe to him all praise, glory and honor. Make known to God that you are his so that at the judgment you may stand. Make your stance known, and put on the true armor of salvation so that you may withstand all the attacks that shall come.

Your Deliverer is at hand. He sits at the door and waits, with his heart in his hand. His story shall not wait.

He was born of a virgin circumcised as Emmanuel, Jesus, God with us, on the eight day.

He taught in the temple the priests, the elders at 12 for it was His house from before the time of creation.

He was an open vessel, baptized by John to fulfill all righteousness. He was the one of whom God said this is my son.

He healed the sick.

He gave hearing to the deaf.

The blind saw.

The dead walked.

He was betrayed for silver.

Judged falsely.

Beaten over 33 times.

Crucified a criminal.

Died as such.

Spent three days in a tomb not his own.

On the third day rose again. He conquered sin and death and has begun to bind Satan.

He lives to never die again.

His Kingdom comes with water and fire, and shall have no end.

Make straight your paths.

The Kingdom is here.

The King is returning.

Amen, Amen. Take heart you weak of spirit, and assailed in the flesh. Your King has won the victory why must you fear. Make strong your shaking knees, and go forth.

The battle calls your name.

How will they hear if there is no to tell them?

Do you call yourself a Christian?

I care not, call yourself a follower of the Most High God, a disciple of Jesus his Holy Son.

Labels mean nothing. The Lord God calls his people to action, why are you waiting? Does the earth stand still? Is tomorrow promised?

Make your word your life.

I am Sean Carroll, a wretched and dreadful sinner, prone to the death of sin and its powers. I Sean Carroll have been cleansed by a power none can conquer. Jesus has come down with his angels in tow and said, Sean, you are forgiven, the angels have exclaimed he is won to the Lord. Jesus said come and learn from me, come and follow me for my yoke is light and the burden easy.

I shall stand for God, and am no longer prone to the failures I have made in this world.

Amazing grace.

Please pray, please come with me. Fight for God and for his most holy Lamb?

Look now it may dark, but with dawn comes rejoicing.

Lord your redemption has a crazy power of us that were once lost. Thank you.

Speak through me once again.

Heaven cries Holy. That you are.

Lord I will follow and seek you every day no longer will the past hinder me.

Friday, January 1, 2010

A New Year, A New Life

Recently I have found myself pondering and dwelling on God's words when it comes to salvation, and redemption. So many times in our church lives we hear of sin, sin, sin, and how we are so broken. I want to know what redemption really feels like.

I want to know what reality is.

This life I know is not real, it is not reality, this is something created by our brains, attacked by demons, and influenced by the world.

I want God's life to reign in me to realize that my sins are gone, that they aren't remembered.

Along those lines, how awesome is God, this was my devotion over the last few days.

Hebrews 8:10-12

10 "This is the covenant I will make with the house of Israel after that time, declares the Lord. I will put my laws in their minds, and write them on their hearts. I will be their God and they will be my people. 11 No longer will a man teach his neighbor, or a man his brother, saying "Know the Lord," because they will all know me, from the least to the greatest. 12 For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more."

The the first thing I read in 2010 was this, thank you Lord for this.

Deuteronomy 26:16-19

16 "The Lord your God commands you this day to follow these decrees and laws; carefully observe them with all your heart and with all your soul. 17 You have declared this day that the Lord is your God and that you will walk in his ways, that you will keep his decrees, commands and laws, and that you will obey him. 18 And the Lord has declared this day that you are his people, his treasured possession as he promised, and that you are to keep all his commands. 19 He has declared that he will set you in praise, fame and honor high above all the nations he has made and that you will be a people holy to the Lord your God as he promised."

So, as I begin 2010 God has told me it doesn't matter what they preach in Church, listen to me and I will speak to your heart, and you will be comforted. No that we are not to listen in Church, but when all our lives we have heard of the downfall of our sin, God does speak that he does not care about them, he loves us. He gave it all up for us to just come home, so in 2010 why don't we just come home? Why don't we just ask God and have the faith to listen?

There is a reality, and that is love beyond our wildest dreams. There is something more than this life. If we just confess and give up and call God how quickly He will rush to pick us up, all he is waiting for is us to say Help. The law was never made for us to uphold but to realize we can not live on our own. But now reality sets in, with redemption is the complete removal of our sins, we are claimed by God, and no demons, no sin, nothing can ever take us away.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

10 Most Meaningful Songs to Me

Colin tagged me and so I saw fit to make sure I filled out my list of 10 most meaningful songs to me, they may be right now, or they may be from way back but here they are.

10. Stay Awake-All Time Low

Go to sleep with the pressure of everyone....
The dedication takes a lifetime, but dreams only last for a night.

Believe you, me, I'll give them anything to show them everything

I have my share of nightmares, and feel the world on my shoulders, but this song says who doesn't. The sun will come up, the dreams only last for a night success is dedication of a lifetime.

9. Get Your Shine On -Birdman, Lil Wayne

They say I walk around like I got an S on my chest
I'ma specialist vet, No testin the best
I be in class, no pencil, no test on the desk...

I come to the defense like Champ Bailey, I'm gone with it

Some say I'm cocky, I'm just confident lol. This song gets me pumped, and has since football 2002.

8. The Great Escape -Boys Like Girls

We'll scream at the top of our lungs
They'll think its cuz we're young

Throw It away
Forget Yesterday
We'll make the great escape

Cause we are finally free tonight.

Love this song, it's about making your own way in life to me.

7. Don't Push Me - 50 Cent, Eminem, Banks

I need you to pray for me and
I need you to care for me and
I need you to want me to win
I need to know where I'm heading,'cause I know where I've been

Under my chest is the heart of a lion

These are my ideas
This is my sweat and tears

Just a song that says I need your prayers, and don't push me, cuz I am giving all I am for what needs to be done.

6. I Don't Care- Fall Out Boy

I Don't Care what you think,
As Long As It's about me,
The best of us can find happiness
In misery

I don't care what you think about me if you have something to say to me, say it. It's the essential song about those who talk about you, behind your back and wish they were you. In that case I respond with the chorus.

5. All Around Me -Flyleaf

My hands are searching for you
My arms are outstretched towards you
I feel you on my fingertips
My tongue dances behind my lips for you

This fire rising through my being
Burning I'm not used to seeing you

The music makes me sway
The angels singing say we are alone with you
I am alone and they are too with you

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

Take my hand
I give it to you
Now you own me
All I am
You said you would never leave me
I believe you
I believe

This is how I felt in India, and it was unreal to feel God that present in everything going on. It how I wish I was with God all the time.

4. Remember the name- Fort Minor

This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name

nobody really knows how or why he works so hard
It seems like he's never got time
Because he writes every note and he writes every line
And I've seen him at work when that light goes on in his mind
It's like a design is written in his head every time
Before he even touches a key or speaks in a rhyme

This song just get's me amp'd. Work hard, never quit.

3. Heart of a champion-Nelly

I'm the first pick, the first round, signin bonus profound
Playin for his hometown, reppin for the home ground
And gettin bucked like Michael Redd, tell 'em again
I gets bucked like Michael Redd, heard what I said?
The MV-P of the game, intensity still the same
I'm shootin out from my reign, with Peyton Manning type aim
Can't stop me from scorin so they results to just hackin
So there's, three of us now - me, A.I. and Shaq and
From the look to the eyes I say
Cover man with more heart than Hallmark on Valentine's Day
I'm the one that you've been Raven about, like Ray Lewis
I think it hard to go and change your route
Cause you don't know if I'm blitzin or if I'm sittin and readin
Waitin for you to go and trip, drop back and throw up a pick, man

Football song, hard work song. Reminds me that "easy work is worthless" and I am going hard till the day I die.

2. I'm like a lawyer- Fall Out Boy

Last year's wishes
Are this year's apologies
Every last time I come home
I take my last chance
To burn a bridge or two
I only keep myself this sick in the head
Cause I know how the words get you {off}

We're the new face of failure
Prettier and younger but not any better off
Bullet proof loneliness
At best, at best

No matter what, we aren't that much better than we think. We never come through on a lot of our wishes and goal, and burn a lot of bridges in the process. We always talk about doing better than the last generation but never do.

1. Saturday- Fall Out Boy
I'm good to go
And I'm going nowhere fast
It could be worse
It could be taking you there with me
I'm good to go
But it looks like I'm still on my own

I'm good to go
For something golden
Though the motions I've been going through have failed
And I'm coasting on potential towards a wall
At a 100 miles an hour

When I say
Two more weeks
My foot is in the door (yeah)
I can't sleep
In the wake of Saturday (Saturday)
When these open doors were open-ended
When these open doors were open-ended

Pete and I attacked the lost Astoria*
with promise and precision and mess of youthful innocence
And I read about the afterlife
But I never really lived more than an hour (more than an hour)

When I say
Two more weeks
My foot is in the door (yeah)
I can't sleep
In the wake of Saturday (Saturday)
When these open doors were open-ended
When these open doors were open-ended

And I read about the afterlife
But I never really lived
And I read about the afterlife
But I never really lived

Two more weeks
My foot is in the door
Me and Pete
In the wake of Saturday
When these open doors were open-ended
When these open doors were open-ended

Let's see, this song is my anthem. It was the send-off song at my wedding. It was the last song on BND tour at Merriweather. It is about finally finding and doing something you love and not be able to live in its wake, and waiting for it to happen again. Hence every Saturday when they would play. I love this song.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Beauty, Busted, Restored

She was a beautiful girl. She was given the world when she was younger. But the older she got the more pride crept in, as she continued to grow in beauty so did her pride and ego. She became a butterfly when she was married, flying and landing one man to the next. Her husbands could never keep her happy with presents and praise, they didn’t appreciate her beauty enough. Now she has become a wasp, everyone in the town avoids her. She is the epitome of beauty, only a little bit busted at this time.

The well, away from town is the only place she can cry, it is the only place she can forget. She goes early, but there is a man there. This man ask, “May I have a drink?” The woman wants to quickly avoid him and says, “Why, as a Jew, would you ask me a Samaritan.” The man replies, “Oh, only if you knew God as I did, I could give you much greater water than this well. You would never thirst again.” The woman replies, “Oh, I would love this water.” It is a chance for her to avoid the others. The man says, “Go, bring your husband and come back.” She replies, “I am not married.” “True, you’ve been married a lot, and living with someone else now” the man replies.

They continue to talk of theology, God and life, who are right Jew or Samaritan. Finally she says “I know the Messiah is coming.” The man says, “I am.” She excitedly hurries, renewed to the city, and brings many to him; she has found the Messiah, the Savior.

One conversation, in love can restore the beauty of this world. If we could be more like this Jesus, what could we do, who could we help, who could we save?

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

December 1st

I must say I don't know what words will follow, but honestly these words will flow from my deepest spirit.

As I am job searching I am looking out of my window and see the apartment complex, the parking lot, the people with heads down go to cars to head to some dead end job where employers expect the world, but give little in return and will fire for no cause because they have a manager that runs the company to the ground while the "good" employees are name calling behind her back.

Now as I look up I see the sky clear blue, and the trees swing picturesque. The colors of fall are turning to the colors of winter the evergreens are ever present, looming a perfect image of endurance. A small, unique blue jay sets on the light post debating which direction he wishes to go.

Why can we not be like the blue jay, we have given up control to do as we wish. We run after the dollar sucked in by the oppression that is political economy. They make us think we need millions, that we need cars. All we need is our God.

But to us we have forgot HIM as well. He is a grandfather, a invisible sky god, removed as we try to build glorious towers that reach higher and higher, we think we can be HIM.

What are we?

We are somewhere between saint or sinner, our mind is full as we silently transgress. No one knows who we really are. We cling to hopes of recreation, we think humans, as if presidents, salvation bring. We bring nothing more than ever increasing desecration. We are the epitome of depravity. Life is nothing more than another dead cliche, it is beauty, busted.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


I want to pretend that the world does spin slowly, and that fireflies never say goodbye.

It seems like we are little better than a lighting bug, who so quickly says goodbye as the sun rises. All we do in life is celebrate goodbyes. By the time we realize a new day is upon us, we say our goodbyes and run. We are perfect at running, and saying goodbye. We never take the time to express ourselves and show others what we really are, to show them the light which shines from within. We push down the things that are different. We push to fit-in. We push to never let our weakness show, to never let our uniqueness be appreciated. By the time we finally begin to know someone we are already beginning to run away. The dance only just begins but we are focused on the last dance, the send off. We go through school and celebrate our end with high school, and college graduation ceremonies, we celebrate the next step without looking back at the people and the first steps. We never truly tell someone how much they mean until a funeral.

There is so much we miss in life trying to find our own way, we miss so many unique dances that other would try to teach us, by not allowing ourselves to join them in a friendship. We are but mere acquaintances, simply acknowledging each other as we pass through a day.

If we ever realized how many misty eyes there are who have been so sad to see us say goodbye so soon.